Advantages of wheelchair or scooter

Posted - June 2014 in HSPRF News

A different view of things

by Malin Dollinger (Doctor, HSPer and Board Member of Spastic Paraplegic Foundation) with important items from others.

 

Total cost of Nike shoes = zero
Never need to change ceiling light bulbs
People often open doors for you
No waiting in line at Disneyland
No knee problems
Cardiac stress test is with drugs, not by an exercise machine
No requirement to take tap dancing classes
Able to use spinner knob while driving
Able to use hand controls in car = much faster reaction time/ safer driving
Easily manipulate power or manual wheelchair, compared to non-handicapped folks
Never have to climb stairs
You get to fill out forms on your lap
Wheelies are a standard manoeuvre
Public bathrooms have much larger stalls for your use
You get to pass the bar every day
Rough pavement aids digestion
Do not need to run in the Boston or other marathons
Your cost of replacement soles and heels for your shoes is zero
You do not need to consider owning a Porsche, a Maserati, a Lamborghini
or a Rolls Royce: your scooter will not fit inside.
No need to climb Mt. Everest
You have special parking places, near entrances
You get help reaching for things on high shelves
Kidnappers are not very interested in you
In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first
No one expects you to run –anywhere
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac
You have no arch support expense
There is nothing left to learn the hard way
You can live without sex but not your glasses or your mobility device
You get into heated arguments about pension plans
You understand Medicare problems better than anybody
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge
You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service
Compared with your non-handicapped friends, you are always “on a roll”
“Wheel and Deal” in your situation refers to a poker game
You will never hurt yourself falling off a roof or a ladder
“Ordinary folks” talk funny when they see you, like “Gotten any traffic tickets lately?”
You have a joystick that other folks do not
Your joystick truly does bring you joy
You have an instant circle of handicapped friends
You are, however, handi-capable!

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